Wine Affairs near downtown San Jose on the Alameda is a huge disappointment in my book. Mostly because it has a lot of potential: great location just a straight shot down the Alameda from my home, an impressive wine selection in quantity and international vintages, a happy hour that runs ’til 8 pm, close to downtown (and TeeNee Thai!), chic interior, a warm and inviting ambience…. However, their blatant lack of customer service cancels all that good stuff out.

There were maybe 6 other customers already wining when my girlfriends and I arrived around 7:30 pm Tuesday. Our group of 5 alone nearly doubled their business. Each of my friends ordered a glass of wine (after our server asked if Rombauer was a beer) and then as a group we ordered all three of the Happy Hour  appetizers. Earlier on their website I’d noticed a special French wine tasting they were offering that day only. It was like pulling teeth getting any information out of our server about it.

Me: “I noticed on your website you’re offering a special wine tasting tonight only.”

Server: “Oh yeah.”

Me: “Can you tell me about it? Like, I don’t really care for reds. I like whites. How many of each are there?”

Server: “You can taste 5 wines from France for $12.” She glanced over at a corner on the opposite side of the room where several people were huddled around a makeshift table/barrel where I was made to assume that the special flight was being poured.

Me: “Oh, it’s over there? Can I order and get it served here?”

Server: “No, you have to go over there but you can bring it back. You’ll just have to move and get more for each tasting.” She said something to this effect. I distinctly remember hearing the word “move” like I was lazy or something. Basically, it was serve yourself or sit over there if you want the special.

Me: “Okay. But is it mostly reds? Mostly whites? How many of each? I don’t really like reds.” And I don’t like having to repeat myself.

Server: “It’s one sparkling wine and the rest are reds.”

Me: “Alright then, I’ll have to French Kiss Flight,” I said, also pointing to it on the menu. Good thing I looked at their regular wine list online earlier.

There are so many things wrong with this exchange on so many levels. And it only gets worse.

When our wine is served a flight of RED WINE  is set in front of me. Okay, well, I was pretty sure I saw a sparkling rose and a pinot blanc in my flight. My friends looked quizzically at me and my flight of reds as I looked over the wine list again. Yup, whites. And these definitely were not. We called someone over. He said he couldn’t help us but that our server would be with us shortly. She wasn’t. She was flirting with some dudes at the bar. We waved her over. She took her pretty time. Okay, to be fair I think she was just helping them and they were taking forever. It did give my friend time to sample my unwanted flight since I was just going to send it back anyways. (My only satisfaction out of the whole debacle was that she got a free mini tasting.) Finally, our server came over. When I mentioned that I’d ordered a white flight, she apologized and said that they have a French Kiss red flight and that’s what she thought I’d ordered. Um, one, I pointed to the flight I wanted at the top of menu where all the whites were when I ordered. Two, I stated TWICE that I don’t like reds so wouldn’t you as a server be inclined to say, “Hey [dumb ass], you mentioned you don’t like reds and this is a red flight. Are you sure you want this?” But no. Instead we had to do this song and dance. She promptly removed the flight and brought me the correct one. Much better. Or so I thought.

Forty five minutes after we arrived and ordered, our appetizers had yet to. They were just simple cheese plates and they weren’t busy so it’s not like they should’ve taken that long. When we inquired whether they were milking the cow and curdling the cheese (not really, but you get the point), our server said, “Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t know you wanted them. I thought you were just asking about them.” SERIOUSLY? No. I was there. My friend clearly said, “We’ll take one of each…” when talking about the happy hour appetizers with our server. And, even if we had just been inquiring about them, wouldn’t you as a server pop by again and ask, “Hey, I know you were asking about our appetizers earlier. Would you like me to put an order in for you?”

So that was our disappointing experience with Wine Affairs on the Alameda. And we all decided we wouldn’t be back. Especially when we saw the bill. $16 for a glass of Talbott Chardonnay that is half the price next door at TeeNee Thai. Talk about overpriced! Next time we’re just going straight to TeeNee. And making a special trip to my all-time favorite wine bar. Because it’s just that good.